Umona azikholeleki de okunene zithi qatha engqondweni yakho. Ngaba yimvakalelo okanye isiphene ekufuneka kujongwe ngaso? Ngokwenene nangaphakathi kweenkolelo zethu Yindalo kwaye kufuneka sikholelwe kuthi nangomnye umntu ukwazi ukuwulawula umona.
Kufuneka iqondwe into yokuba Umona bubungqina obukhulu bothando kodwa unokudlala amaqhinga amabi kakhulu ukuba agqithise. Ukuba azilawulwa, zinokubangela iziphumo ezibulalayo. Ukuba elinye lamalungu amabini esi sibini linomona kakhulu, ulwalamano lunokuqalisa ukuqhawuka kwaye lube buthathaka.
Kutheni unesikhwele nje?
Umona yimpendulo yeemvakalelo ukuba umntu ubandezeleke xa eziva esongelwa ngokuphulukana nento ethathwa ngokuba 'yeyakhe'. Loo mvakalelo idalwa kukungazithembi, ukholelwa ukuba umntu omthandayo inikela ingqalelo engakumbi komnye.
Akwaziwa ukuba olu hlobo lwemeko luzalwa nini. Umntu uye wakwazi ukujamelana nale meko ngaphambili, mhlawumbi ndisengumntwana nangokufika komzalwana. Okanye mhlawumbi kunye nenqanaba lokufikisa ngamava phakathi kwabahlobo kunye nothando lokuqala.
- Umntu onezinto ezininzi zokungazithembi ibonisa umona, kwiimeko ezininzi zivela kolunye ubudlelwane bothando okanye amava amabi kubudlelwane bentsapho.
- Enye yiba nemvakalelo yokuba nobutyebi kwaye loo meko idalwe nabo bonke abantu esibathandayo, abahlobo kunye nosapho. Esi senzo sisoloko sityholwa ngaso ukungazithembi, into yokusebenzela.
Kukho oko zama ukuwulawula umona Ukuba ubusoloko uziva kwaye uyazi ukuba ngamanye amaxesha le nyaniso ikugcinile. Unga xela inkxalabo yakho kumntu omthembileyo, kodwa musa ukuba phithi yile meko, kuba isenokubonakala ngathi yiparanoia. Umntu obandakanyekayo naye akanakwazi "ngokupheleleyo" imvakalelo yakho, njengoko inokosulela kwaye imeko ibe kubudlelwane obuyityhefu.
Yintoni esinokuyenza ukuze silawule umona?
Kukho oko zama ukwakha zonke ezo ziseko loo nto ikhokelela ekubeni ubani abe nomona. Kufuneka ngokwenene uyamkele le ngxaki ukuba uziva kwaye uziva ngaphandle kwesizathu. Phakathi kwezi ziseko kufuneka kuvavanye ukungakhuseleki kwethu kunye nokungazithembi kwaye usebenze konke.
Kukho oko zibethelele zonke ezi ziphene kuba ngaloo ndlela sinokuphila ubomi obunyamezeleka ngakumbi. Akukho mfuneko yokwenzakala kuba into esiphazamisayo, yimeko yentloko yethu ukuba siqhubeke singaphumli ngento esikhathazayo. Zonke ezi ngcamango kufuneka zongezwe kunye nezinye iingcamango, akuyona into elula kwaye ngoko kufuneka usebenze yonke imihla.
Sukuzama ukufumanisa wenza ntoni lamntu rhoqo. I intanethi Yiloo nxalenye esenza ukuba sibone uninzi lwezinto ezikhangayo zomntu, iinkxalabo kunye nemisebenzi yasekhaya. Ukuba awukwazi ukusingatha iimvakalelo zakho zokusingatha le meko kungcono ukuyigxotha, unokudibanisa amaxesha ngamaxesha ukuze ukhumbule ukuba unokuyoyisa. Kodwa ukuba ayinakuba njalo qhawula ngokupheleleyo.
Kukho oko zama ukuphakamisa ukuzithemba ngolunye uhlobo. Cinga ukuba loo mntu ukhethe ukuba ube nawe kwaye ukuba uqhubeka nokubethelela isidima sakho esiphantsi kunye nekhwele lakho ekugqibeleni akayi kufuna ukuba nawe. Iimpawu zakho nendlela oyiyo zonke eziye zamenza ukuba akuthande, ngoko uxabisa yonke into onayo ibe oko kuya kukomeleza.
Musa ukuzama ukudlala umdlalo "womona"., inokusebenza, kodwa ekuhambeni kwexesha ayilunganga. Ithabatha indawo yokudlulisela ukuthembana phakathi kwezi zibini, ekubeni xa sivakalelwa kukuba asiziva sicinezelekile kangako. Ukuthembela kufuneka kuzalwe ngabo bobabini, ukomeleza olo dlelwane kunye nokunika ivoti yokuzithemba.
Kufuneka ube yinyani kwaye uhlakulele imibono emihle entlokweni yakho, yonke into embi kufuneka iphumele ngaphandle. Kuhle kakhulu ukubulela ngayo yonke into onayo kwaye yiba nethemba, iya kuba yimeko yakho engcono. Kufuneka unikeze ithemba lakho njengoko sele sihlolisise, kwaye inzuzo yokuthandabuza ingaba khona, kodwa ngaphandle kokubanga rhoqo ukuba ikhwele.
Eyona ndlela ilungileyo yokubeka ubudlelwane Zama ukuthetha nomnye umntu kwaye uchaze indlela oziva ngayo. Mhlawumbi ngumona we-pathological ekufuneka usebenze kuwo. Okanye mhlawumbi liqabane lakho elinale ngcamango ngokugqithisileyo kwaye lifuna ukuchitha ixesha elininzi nabanye abantu kunawe. Ukuthetha kusombulula iingxabano ezininzi kwaye kuyanceda ukuqonda zonke iingxaki ojongene nazo.
Amaxesha amaninzi siziva ukuba ukungakhuseleki kunye nomona ngenxa omnye umntu akabonisi ukuzithemba. Ukuba ikubonisa imfihlakalo, ayivulwanga, unyanisile ngobuxoki kwaye kunzima kuyo ukuvuma ukuzibophelela, mhlawumbi asingomntu lowo ngubani omele abe secaleni kwakho. Kuya kufuneka uzibeke kwaye uzixhobise ukuba uyazithanda kwaye uthembele ukuba uya kube sele umazi ngcono umntu. Ukuba awukwazi ukufumana izixhobo zakho, unokuhlala ucela uncedo kwingcali.