Siyazi ukuba ikhefu lothando hayi elinye lamaxesha amahle ebomini ukuze sibe namava. Uthando esivakalelwa ngalo ngabanye abantu luyinto ekhethekileyo, kwaye yile xa sithandana sifuna ukukholelwa ekubeni kuya kubakho ngonaphakade. Ukulibala i-ex yakho lelinye inqanaba ekunzima ukohlula, emva koqhawulo-mtshato.
Asazi ukuba singoyisa njani okanye sijongane nale meko, nkqu siyayazi indlela yokwamkela okwenzekileyo. Nangona ubudlelwane ekugqibeleni babungazinzanga ngenxa yeemeko ezahlukeneyo, asazi ukuba singoyisa njani. Kwaye asazi ukuba ungayifumana njani ingcinga kwintlungu yethu kwaye kunjalo amaxesha amaninzi siyoyiswa ngokuncamathisela saziva ngalo mntu.
Kutheni ndingakwazi ukulibala?
Ngokuqinisekileyo mininzi imibuzo yakho kwimeko enjalo. Zininzi okanye zichaze izizathu ongenakucinga ngayo, kodwa kukho ubungqina obucacileyo kwaye oko kukuthi xa uthandana uneengcinga ezahlukeneyo malunga naloo mntu. Mhlawumbi uye wamlungelelanisa ngakumbi kunokuba ucinga kwaye ubuhle bakhe bube ngaphezulu, mhlawumbi uzilibele iimpazamo zabo.
Izicwangciso zakho zekamva kunye naloo mntu babekhohlisa kakhulu. Uye wazicingela ukuqala usapho, ukuba nobomi obuzolileyo kunye noxolo naye. Mhlawumbi iinjongo zakho njengendoda zigqunyiwe yokufuna ukwabelana ngezicwangciso zakho kunye. Ngale ndlela ubonakala ulahlekile kwaye udidekile kwaye ngoku awufuni kutshintsha indlela ophila ngayo.
Nangona inokubonakala ingaqhelekanga kuwe, isenokuba njalo yiba nokuzithanda. Intlungu enkulu inokunyusa ukuzazisa kwabantu kwaye kule meko yeyakho. Ungakholelwa ukuba lomntu usezandleni zakho, kodwa kufuneka vumela izigqibo zakho zigeleze kwaye zihlale zingathathi cala. Uloyiko lokuba wedwa yinto ethi usenze sisoyika isizungu, Isenza sizive sifudukile kwaye singakhuselekanga.
Amanyathelo afanelekileyo endlela yokulibala i-ex yakho
- Ukwamkelwa lelinye lamanyathelo okuqala. Awunakho ukuzikhwebula kwiimvakalelo zakho, kwinto oziva ngayo, kodwa kube kanye kuya kufuneka uthathe olo kuvunywa. Sukuyibhidanisa ukurhoxa, kuba oku kunokudala ukuthandabuza xa ufuna ukuzama uxolelwaniso olunokwenzeka. Ukuba ubona ukuba iziphumo azinakuphikwa kwaye akukho ndlela yakuphuma kwithuba elitsha, ulwamkelo lelona nyathelo lilungileyo. Ekuhambeni kwexesha izakusishiya cinga ngekamva ngcono kwaye uzivulele kumava amatsha.
- Kufuneke u zilinganise izinto ezingalunganga ezikhokelele kwimeko enjalo. Awunakuhlala ujonga kuko konke okuhle okuye kwakho phakathi kwezi zimbini, mhlawumbi eyona ndlela yokujongana nayo yile jonga ukuba wonakalisa njani olo lwalamano.
- Ukugcina uxakekile sisindululo esifanelekileyo ukuze ukwazi ukwenza le nto ubusoloko uyicebisa. Musa ukuziva unetyala malunga noko kwenzekileyo, khangela imida yakho kwaye phinda wenze ngaphakathi kwakho imisebenzi okanye izifundo ozithandayo kwaye zikuncede uziphucule. Ukuba ngaphambi kokudibana naloo mntu sele uzibekele iinjongo, eli lelona xesha lilungileyo lokubanika ukubaluleka kwakhona.
- Guqula indlela yakho yesiqhelo, ngoku unexesha elininzi loku thatha ixesha lakho. Yenza imisebenzi emitsha ekukhuthazayo, phuma uye uzingqonge ngabantu abatsha.
- Khangela ezinye iintlobo zamasiko kunye Ukuzivocavoca ngaphandle. Imidlalo yenye yeendlela ezilungileyo zokwenza gcina ingqondo nomzimba zilungelelaniswe. Uya kunceda iintlungu zihamba ngendlela engcono, ewe, ngexesha kunye noqeqesho. Oku akunakoyiswa ngokukhawuleza.
Amanyathelo angqongqo okoyisa
- Eyona ndlela yokugqitha kuyo yile ukunqanda ukunxibelelana naye ngokupheleleyo. Ngangoko uthanda ukusondela kuye, oku kuya kuba njalo eyona ndlela yokuyikhupha engqondweni yakho. Ngale ndlela ngekhe wazi nto ngaye kwaye ke ngekhe wenzakaliswe yiyo nantoni na ayenzayo kubomi bakhe obutsha. Susa zonke izinto ezikukhumbuza ngaye… Iifoto, izipho okanye nayiphi na into ehambelana nayo.
- Funa uncedo lweengcali Ukuba ucinga ukuba le yimeko ongenakuyoyisa, yenye yeendlela ezilungileyo zokuzoyisa. Phuma nabahlobo, nabo ubathembileyo. Singamadoda siyathanda ukungena emqolombeni wethu, kodwa jonga ukuzithemba phesheya kwaye uxele ngemeko yakho enzima. Zama ukuphatha iingcebiso abakunika zona ngeyona ndlela ingcono, musa ukuthabatheka ngumsindo.
- Vumela ukuthandwa, licebo elisebenzayo. Thatha ixesha lakho kwaye ungayenzi ngaphandle kwesibophelelo, kodwa yikholelwe, kuba iyinto efanelekileyo. Khangela abafowunelwa babanye abahlobo bakudala kwaye Fumana ubudlelwane, udlale ngothando kwaye uziqinise. Kuya kufuneka uphume uye kwihlabathi elitsha lamathuba.
Njengengcebiso yokugqibela, ukuziqhelanisa ekufuneka sikuxabisile funda kwiimpazamo zethu. Zama ukuhlalutya into oyenzileyo engalunganga kwaye uzame ukuvavanya ukuba ungakanani awunyanzelekanga ukuba uphinde uyimilisele kwakhona kwixa elizayo. Ewe sukuziva unetyala malunga nento eyenzekileyo, ukusoloko uziphindaphinda okwangoku kukwenza wehle rhoqo, kufuneka uphakamise ukuzithemba kwakho.