According to the World Health Organization (WHO) addiction is a physical and psycho-emotional disease that creates a dependency or need for a substance, activity, or relationship. In order to diagnose an addiction, several signs and symptoms have to be given together that involve biological, genetic, psychological and social factors. Addiction is characterized by continuous episodes of lack of control, denials of the disease and distortions of thought.
The main addictions have always been related to drug and alcohol use, but for some time now, sex has come to have a role to take into account within addictions, especially as a result of the actor Michael Douglas' admission to a rehabilitation clinic, for, according to his own statements, being addicted to sex.
To try to shed light on this matter, the University of Cambridge performed several brain scans on a group of men while they were consuming pornographic content. During the study it was found that during the consumption of pornography, activated the same part of the brain that activates drug users when they are in possession of the substance they consume.
Subsequently, MRIs were performed on healthy people and sex addicts. People addicted to sex showed increased brain activity in three parts of the brain: the amygdala, the cortex of the anterior cingulate and the ventral stratum. These are the same areas that register a higher rate of activity in those addicted to drugs when they visualize the one they consume the most.
What is sex addiction?
We can consider that a person is addicted to sex, when the individual's search for sexual satisfaction occupies a large part of the day and the desire to have sex is too frequent. As a general rule, most sex addicts seek to satisfy their needs through other people, never with a partner, so over time a world of lies is built around them that sooner or later falls with devastating consequences for them. the family structure.
This irrepressible desire to have sex to satisfy the strong sexual desire, can sometimes force addicts to get to satisfy their desires with people of the same sex, anywhere and with anyone with whom they do not have any type of relationship. These sporadic relationships, without a minimum of protection, can cause the transmission of sexual diseases that can finally be transmitted to the partner with whom you are living.
How to diagnose sex addiction?
Many people use sex to try to reduce stress, to avoid having to maintain a stable relationship with all that it implies or simply to enjoy the moment, but they cannot be considered sex addicts for that. Addiction, as the name indicates, creates a dependency on sex, without it we could not live. When sexual desires come to control all aspects of a person's life, that is when we must begin to worry seriously since sex is the main reason for their existence. A team of psychologists and psychiatrists from the University of California has carried out different tests among a group of individuals in order to diagnose the so-called hypersexual disorder as one more type of mental health disorder.
The researchers corroborate the criteria used when diagnosing sexual addiction Through a study with more than 200 people with different mental health problems, 88% of patients were able to diagnose correctly. Of this 88% of patients, the majority suffered the consequences of this addiction such as losing a job on some occasion (17%), ending a romantic relationship (39%) and 28% had contracted a sexually transmitted disease.
But these tests also revealed that 54% of sex addicts, became aware of their behavior before the age of 18. 30% of them experience this addiction to sex only in their university stage, between the ages of 18 and 25. The most common behaviors to recognize this type of disease were excessive consumption of pornography and especially compulsive masturbation on occasions, in addition to going to bed each time with different people who are not linked by any type of relationship, being able to sleep with 15 different people Over 12 months, what today we would consider a friend fucker, an acquaintance with whom only certain people meet to satisfy their sexual desires.
What Causes Sex Addiction?
Sexual addiction, also known as hypersexuality in general, nymphomania in women, and satiriasis in men is born of the abnormally strong need that people have to satisfy their thoughts, which affects day-to-day relationships at work and in the environment of your partner and friends. This need is preceded by compulsive masturbation, multiple sexual relations with different partners in the same night or jointly, prostitution, viewing pornography in all its forms and even in some cases it causes exhibitionist attitudes on the part of those affected.
Many are the experts who have tried to delve into sex addiction, as we have commented above in the study carried out by the University of Cambridge in which the functioning of the brain was investigated when exposed to pornography by addicted individuals and normal people.
Some experts claim that the reason these people are addicted to sex is due to a biochemical abnormality or certain chemical changes in the brain that reward the brain for the use of sex, drugs, alcohol or any other type of addiction.
Other studies affirm that addiction could be due to lesions in the medial prefrontal cortex of the brain leading to compulsive sexual behavior, hence people with problems of abuse in childhood or family problems are more likely to appear this disorder.
However the problem of sex addiction is not always originated in the brain or problems of abuse in the past, but we also find groups of people who like the search for new sensations, which can lead to the development of addictions if the people in question do not manage the use of these sensations well.
Are you addicted to sex?
People addicted to sex usually present the following characteristics many of which are common to other addictions such as drugs, where the deception of the environment and especially the denial of the problem with the most harmful characteristics for those who suffer it:
- Lack of concentration throughout the day, which sometimes leads to job loss.
- Constantly masturbates despite having satisfactory sex with partner
- Despite knowing that you are doing it wrong, you persist despite the negative consequences.
- He spends most of the day having sexual thoughts almost continuously.
- You are unable to control your sex drive.
- People who are addicted to sex are always looking for someone who also likes sex, so they can spend a lot of time trying to flirt with the people around them.
- He hides his sexual problems through deception and lies.
- Spend too much time looking for sex.
- Low self-esteem.
- It presents withdrawal syndrome very similar to that shown by people addicted to drugs.
Nymphomania and Satiriasis
Sexual addiction is not an exclusive problem for men, even if it is the most common. In women, sexual addiction or hypersexuality is called nymphomania, while in men it is called satiriasis. Both terms are not considered as diseases within mental disorders but they are mentioned in the International Classification of Diseases. It is estimated that 6% of the world's population suffers from this disease, of which only 2% of those affected are women.
I think the best thing is not to resort to pornography frequently because it can bring mental disorders that can become a dangerous illness that can affect second and third parties, but it can also serve to clear doubts about the passion for sex
No, I think it can become a disease, if it can become addictive ... but if we think about the quote that they put in the article in the same way it can become addicted to sex, as well as many other things that wake you up emotionally or sexually not necessarily sexual. That's my humble opinion
I think it is the worst thing they have invented, thanks to porn many men cannot meet their women, because of their addiction, thus creating many painful separations for women and full of loneliness for men who cannot distinguish between real and fiction, since it creates addiction and when they feel like it they look for that and not the partner
I find this about porn and masturbation very interesting because we can help ourselves in this document to know how everything is because it becomes an addiction and causes us mental and physical problems if we overdo it.
Well, I think I have a problem with the control of my thoughts because I took an year that I had my first girlfriend and only with the first kiss that I half because you could say that I wet my panties than one ebacua in the sexual act Imagine the berguensa of the smell of that but hey, it has been 12 months since then and with that woman it lasted a month and the problem is that we did not have sex, only jokes and I think it hurt me because when I start talking with a woman The same thing happens that I spent the first kiss with that woman and now it turns out that I can't talk to any woman because that happens to me, I went to an orologist and he told me that I have nothing and that he cannot do anything because I have nothing and I feel so frustrated because I don't know what to do, before I could be with a most beautiful woman and nothing happened to me and now I can't talk to any woman who calls me about that. I hope you can help me, thank you very much
Hello.! I am going through a difficult situation !! I have been married for 4 years and generally I do not have intimacy with my husband and it is because I discovered and watches pornography and masturbates .. How do you think I feel ??? Not only on the internet if not on cable .. Discussed all the time and I think he is not excited with me because habeses has left me wanting what I can do ???
You have to go to therapy with an addiction specialist and have a lot of willpower to quit, otherwise, it will kill your self-esteem, temperament and good will, not to mention that he always blames you telling you that he is normal and that you are the one. that it no longer excites him, because you no longer fix yourself or take care or carry or do what he likes ... an addict to this refuses to believe and think that they are the ones with the problem, in fact they believe that it is not a problem and they will always blame women for their addiction ... be careful, think if it is worth losing time and effort with a man like that, you can end up very sad and affected and he may never want to change and if he decides to do it, you will end up very worn out Trying to help him, by the time he is well, you will be very bad, I tell you from experience of living a long time with such a man
That happens to me, I keep fighting but I'm getting worse and worse, I have fits of hysteria because of his flatness of touch with me, he says he loves me and kisses and hugs me, but I need more and I feel powerless
Hello joa, the same thing happens to me, my husband looks at that and does the same as yours, we don't have relationships because when he feels like it, he gets into it, and we go to couples therapy, even if you don't think we've made progress, then there first They forbade us to have intercourse, the second week we caressed each other for five minutes a day and talked for half an hour, which is impossible, it is difficult for him to concentrate with me since he always has his mind on that disgusting thing, I hate that invention,
Hello, I am addicted to porn for years I have been watching I want to leave it and I can not and I keep looking until I stop seeing my friends for watching porn and I leave my way of being social because of porn I have a lot of content a complete collection and I would like to leave the porn but I can not thank you for your attention
Hello, well I write here since I have been looking for information on the subject since it was not long ago that I realized that I was a serious addict to pornography and how this affected me in life. I tell you this since I have suffered from it for many years, and I put aside many important things just for wanting to see pornography, and neglected studies, friends, girlfriends, family, everything out of the game this has affected me a lot, many times hard hoooorasss watching porn sometimes until the wee hours of the morning, I know I have to study for an exam at the university but still I lock myself in my room and start watching porn, and stopped going to some places because I was alone At home watching porn, and I stopped doing so many things just for that and it really bothers me a lot that until now at my 23 years of age I have come to realize that, I would like to be advised by people who are going through the same thing and they have surpassed it, or experts on this page I see that the publication of this article is from 2009, but I really believe that this topic is of great importance, not only do you become addicted to drugs or alcohol I think this It is a vastly serious addiction because no one notices it and sometimes you don't even realize it, please I really need help in this regard, it makes it difficult for me to quit. I'm going to see if I can find a way to block the porn sites that I regularly visit, I don't know what other techniques to use to overcome this.
My dear friend, I give you the key to vices and especially why you are so attached to it. The key to all vice whether you are conscious or not is: PAIN. This is how nothing in this world makes you so pleasant when there is pain involved, from pain to pleasure only one step, which is produced by an unhealthy thought, obviously of yourself and of life itself, for example the alcoholic takes for not being able to "swallow" something that is difficult for you to assimilate, so if you are looking for sexual fantasy it may be that you feel bad about yourself, or you do not like the life you lead that you need to "escape" from your reality, all this is in your subconscious !! The first thing you should do is "FORGIVE YOURSELF" whenever you make any mistake and above all continue in pornography ... FORGIVENESS is releasing stuck pain. Do it for your whole life and forgive everyone who offended you, offends you, life, etc ... Control anger and SADNESS with TOLERANCE, PATIENCE AND JOY OF LIVING, and of your own life. INCREASE your SELF-ESTEEM pay attention to what you are self-valuing and accepting, therefore identifying, because SELF-ESTEEM is the basis and key to overcoming any imbalance and vices mainly, I advise you to study spirituality books (waters with fanatics and false religions and atheists and false science) PRAY a lot because the spiritual has great strength if you really want to change, UNDERSTAND that you are not BODY OR MIND but one is YOUR VEHICLE AND THE OTHER YOUR ENGINE respectively but not you, you are SPIRIT as such you have all the possibilities and opportunities to control and dominate vice instead of it controlling you !! It is better that you look like this so that you do not fall into the AUTOLASTIMA generated by letting go of something strong like the vice fed for years! and AVOID falling into it, never observe yourself or have the perspective of yourself that you cannot, IF YOU CAN AND HAVE EVERYTHING !! It is difficult to get rid of vice but NOT IMPOSSIBLE, just as you fell into it, it is possible to get out of it. DO NOT CLOSE TO THE POSSIBILITIES AND OPPORTUNITIES .. USE THEM AND ABOVE ALL PRACTICE THEM. Start at the beginning you will know what it is. Everything is a step-by-step process, this is so that you do not bounce like those who eat a lot and then stop eating all at once or want to instantly stop it as if by magic, they fall again AND IT IS HARDER !! be MODERATE, slow down the pace at which you see pornography and mentally, and leave everything that reminds you of it, and stop practicing it, always practice your self-esteem at the same time: above all, NEVER CRITICIZE, JUDGE AND CONDEMN yourself, first of all forgive yourself. If you fall again and start again, forgive yourself as many times as necessary until you give up the vice. And first of all, look for the SUPREME BEING and ABANDON HIM and ask him what is the best way for you to stop what you have gotten into, he is the one who knows everything perfectly, WITH GOD EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE, remember !!! I recommend the BHAGAVAD GITA, I recommend the teachings of Jesus contained in the Gospels because there are the supreme techniques of liberation of being! They are important keys, for example: that you live in the PRESENT, which is very important if you want to progress because thinking about the past results in a disintegration at the level of being and mental, you do not pay all your attention to the present! and the future because it mainly brings you anxiety, doubts and fear even paranoia .. This is what Jesus says when he says that only the problems of each day are enough. and no more ... LIVING IN THE PRESENT is a great key to your self-liberation !!! I also recommend Buddhism, especially studying the eightfold path of the BUDDHA because it is all a mental control towards the self-liberation of being. And the three books of armando rekury of VITAELOGIA Y ZEN. hanuvah@hotmail.es NOT TO LA PIRTARIA but it is only sold in cuernavaca by the libriria la ranacasona. And study elizabeth clare prophet's books, like the alchemy of the heart, she has very good books on self-help and advanced spirituality, and what I like the most is THE SCIENCE OF THE SPOKEN WORD AND THE VIOLET FLAME, uff with these two main techniques and What I told you at the beginning was quick and almost painless the detachment of my vice, that like you I fell into pornography and self-harm. But I looked for help and I found it! I wanted to leave and I left !!! I tried hard and I wanted to, if I made mistakes I would review them impartially and correct them, I kept insisting with the same technique until I came out !! Well, I left my stubbornness and pride and surrendered to the SUPREME BEING and the teachings of KRISHNA, JESUS, BUDDHA AND MARK AND ELIZABETH CLARE PROPHET And others more ... but believe me nothing more revitalizing and hopeful in these cases of vice is knowing who we are and what where we come from, and trust in it and above all in the SUPREME BEING that is the very source of life, ask him for wisdom and strength and love to get out of your hole, and you will see that you will come out if you are not stubborn and narrow-minded ... the matter is: DO YOU WANT TO EXIT YES OR NO? ONLY GOD CAN HELP YOU !! Vice is a psychological, emotional, physiological and soul disease well ... greetings .. I know a lot but it will help you to get out of it and have the confidence that if you can get out and never fall into it again .. well all this takes you to self-knowledge of yourself !! MAN KNOW YOURSELF !! AND SEE YOUR IMMENSE POSSIBILITIES AND OPPORTUNITIES AND THE GREAT DIVINE BEING THAT YOU ARE FOR YOU TO CONTINUE IN THE RECALCITING HUMAN AND ANIMAL HABITS THAT DEGRADE AND ANNIHILATE YOU… the principle is to renew from the inside out… the changes are NEVER from the outside in… YOU ARE TRANSFORMED BY THE RENEWAL OF YOUR MIND ... AND WITH THIS I ALREADY GAVE THEM TOO MUCH ... OPEN MIND !!! (that is, open to possibilities and opportunities) the solution is not only found by man and his science, which is just like a little boy who is not capable of waving in the dark abysses of being and the universe or the cosmos! Greetings and that they serve you .. ADVICE: if you criticize, judge and condemn this method or any other that life offers you ... consider yourself lost because beforehand you have already failed .. there are methods that serve as those that do not .. so be careful and Do not be naive, let yourself be carried away by the moment and abuse you for your despair and naivety and pain of the moment, that is why many no longer believe in other good and functional methods because they fell through their own naivety where they lost their faith! THE DIFFICULT IS THE BEST AND THE MOST PRACTICAL AND FUNCTIONAL. WITHOUT EFFORT NOTHING IS POSSIBLE….
Thank you, ZAGROS, interesting your article, it helps to remember what I really should do, forgive me, xD how it costs… and live this present, I don't have anything else… I'll write you through the books, thank you
I need urgent help with my husband and his pornography problem, I fear for my 3 daughters.
Do one hour a week of Eucharistic Adoration, between 1996 and 2016, I saw that crap, I clarify that I am 28 years old, I always wanted to leave it and I could not. Since I started praying in the Worship room, in an Apostolic and Roman Catholic Church. Only God has power over me and prevents me from falling back into pornography, exercise, have faith, find yourself a girlfriend who is good and helps you.
Do not watch television (pornographic or erotic movies, or anyone with nude scenes). Do not read erotic stories or listen to them,
You are a human being created in the image and likeness of God, there are so many things that make us feel prouder such as having a profession as journalist, engineer, doctor, etc.
Do not hesitate, read the Bible, attend mass every day, talk to the priests about this, confess and commune in grace, it will do your soul good to be closer to Christ, for him nothing is impossible. Read books that help you as a person, that entertain you and make you imagine fantastic worlds that take you away from anything ugly or bad.
Do sports, watch sports, read about sports, it is the healthiest and most beautiful as long as you do not overdo it.
If with all this you keep watching the Internet or the cable or the cell phone, unplug everything.
Find a doctor and ask for help.
I wish you the best, if I could, you too.
To always win or die trying.
Anonymous, as you have been; You've already overcome all that, I'm a guy almost the same age and I'm going there little by little… Blessings and lots of encouragement ..
I was also involved for a long time in this pornography and maybe I know more pages than you haha but let me tell you something I could never with my strength, I was always frustrated and depressed until God changed my life the only way out is Christ, crazy is the only one exit
accept it in your heart and invite it to dwell in you
Blocking will be of no use to you, as soon as you feel like it you will unlock them, I know from experience, my partner has spent many years, lost a lot because of that, but he does not realize, even now he is hurting me without knowing it by rejecting me for that, we are in therapy for about 8 months in which, due to work, he only attended two months, I do not see any improvement, he even lies to be able to see that, I see it, I notice it, and I feel badly powerless, because I know that addiction is going to end with our love and I have been fighting for 6 years and he has been fighting with his addiction for more than 20 years, it is difficult to quit, painful for both parties but you have to go to a professional and it will still be difficult, I am sorry I did not say anything good, I Since I've been with him, I've loved him madly and lost self-esteem, taken on weight by the depression that I'm dragging, I feel as if I were little and those pages gave him life and I was worth nothing at all
How about, the addiction to pornography is difficult to quit as well as the addiction to some type of substance, what happens many times is that it is seen as an outlet for some type of tension, or anxiety, the closer you are of places, things, people, situations, etc., that trigger a situation where you end up watching pornography, it will be easier for you to relapse, it is not an easy thing, but nothing is impossible, you can start by moving away from everything that causes you to end up watching pornography, you can Do activities that are satisfactory to you with other people such as going for a walk, going to the movies, having a dinner, etc.
If you want more information here is my address, bru_flo@hotmail.com
Pornography is the disease that completely destroys the human being, taking into account that it damages body, mind and soul and in the eyes of God it is an aversion
I think it is a big problem because it is something for many people, although someone once told me that it is something that everyone desires to see and it should not be forbidden because that makes it even better for most people.
in the same way it should not be seen very often ...
I think that it is something bad for many, although someone once told me that each one decides what they want to see, that people should not be forbidden, because this makes them see it even more good only for defying other people's rules.
Even so, it is a bit bad for everyone in excess like everything in this world ...
and it is very bad when it begins to be seen as a means of masturbation
anonymously, first do not block the pages because, although it is bad, it is better to leave them on the other side, because there will be more and more pages and that is almost irremediable.
It is better that you seek help from experts who will give you a solution, or if you do not know someone who knows about these things, look for him through a friend or partner who will tell you where to contact him.
okay. That would be the best in my opinion, although I don't know what you think.
Ariel, I think that what happens to you is that you get excited very easily, and that is already a different problem from any that I have seen in my life
Joa, try to make yourself very pretty and never neglect yourself, he will surely like that
Hello, first of all, very good idea or initiative on the part of Lorenzo to launch this type of information for some people who are addicted to masturbation, apornography and other things that hurt me but that I do not realize how dangerous this can be All this what you say is very true, this has happened to me as you relate it, but before my disease continues to grow, I need your help, my friend, I will be thanking you in advance. I have been masturbating for five years at first I felt it something rich something like a joy but little by little I am destroying myself until my rhodias hurt I feel exhausted, but I want you to help me please so far I have not had ralations because I feel like I will fail at the moment.
As I told you, I have been masturbating for five years, I started when I was 15 years old, it was at school when a group of classmates were watching a card game where naked women appeared in that, a classmate comments to me, I was a manuela and began to touch her parts and not I know how but I think the emotion won over me but when I was already in the bathroom and started to touch me and a white liquid came out and I was surprised because I had never seen pornography nor had I heard how this manuela is or anything like that but there I began to lose myself from that day on I began to masturbate 3 to 5 times a day always watching magazines in the bathroom from today on sometimes I get tired I only do 3 times but sometimes I try to limit myself but I feel that I do not improve that is why I need your help Lorenzo 'please is that seto is very desperate for me I started from 15 years to today that I am 21 years old, please help me thanks a hug.
I believe that those patients who watch pornography should see a prison sentence, especially if they are addicts and have families because, as they already say, they can affect second and third parties and that is why there are rapists not only on the streets but also within our own homes and thus can harm us and especially children
Grafia pornography is a disease that can be controlled but you have to put a lot into force and with the help of God
Any information that helps those who suffer from an addiction is appreciated and if it is related to porn is valuable, since it is important to insist and make it clear that it causes damage to mental and physical health that destroys life as a couple and in society.
I was raped by my brothers on several occasions and I am addicted to pornography and masturbation, I do not stop watching child porn tooooovery day I also raped a minor, every time I look for stronger porn, I saw porn for the first time at 11 years old, I've had gay fantasies when but I watch a lot of porn, I feel like I don't care much about the people I love. I fear that in the future I could be more depraved and could harm my nieces since I already raped a minor to whom I was trying, who was first subjected and then penetrated abusively, I feel more for the fact of having him hurt a person; In order to rape her, I remembered images seen in the pono to excite me; And I also masturbated seeing images in which a girl looked like her.
shit and shit child pornography, zoophilia, heroin and religious fanaticism are not bad ... (as long as there is no direct or indirect contact with them) there are those who think that porn is not bad, but they are aware of the super mafias that there is behind a lot of material that is for sale easily, do you know how many "actors" are assassinated monthly? It is known that the human brain is more associative than is thought and that all pleasurable stimulation involves an action plan and that our brain when watching child porn, if there is pleasure in it, generates an action plan in which we want to have sex with the neighbor's daughter who is 10 years old? Did you know that when you see something pleasant many times you end up accepting that this pleasant is the right thing to do? Did you know that after doing something many times you end up turning it into a habit and that if that habit is self-destructive it is called a vice?
Well, well, I have proposed to see and not feel and I am achieving it .. you have to know the enemy and have a lot of will power ..
to the truth I think that I'm involved in all this and I don't know how to free myself xD I'm already older I'm 34 years married and go ahead and see these scenes, I don't know what to do I feel terrible, worse something curious, I like to see it, but then I feel bad because I see, they will say «don't see it, be strong, you can» but I don't know what is wrong with me and I do it ......
Please write to me aguilar220@hotmail.com
I want to help you.
Hello brothers, Let's not judge those of us who are not addicted to pornography. I am not an addict but I almost reached that extreme. There are endless addictions, anti values that the human mind itself creates depends on our weakness. Let us remember that we are not perfect and that God gave us the option of free will; however, as comrade Zagros says, if we do not have firm foundations for our eyes and minds to be attentive, we fall. We are like robots with a hard drive, if we are without God. Let us remember that we have a way to go but without God there is no way. Pornography for those of us alone is more difficult to avoid. Only your own will with the help of God will open windows ... It is horrible to be like that. See the ladies with desire. (Imagine, you know). Even more. Have a sense of guilt when you love your partner…. Truly, only yourself and with God can make the change….
It is evident that this is a social evil, and yet it is promoted almost explicitly on TV, advertisements, music and the internet ...
No one can watch porn videos regularly and then deal with others in the same way… Porn distorts the way you see other people.
I put to the consideration of the other three actions that we can do to get out of this:
1-Ask God for help (beyond the religion to which we belong, there is a Supreme Being who created us, knows us and can help us).
2-Make the firm decision to leave it. To do this, we cling to what we want, and not what we want. Because it is clear that at the moment we want to see pornography, but do we really want to live our whole lives leaving aside work, study, friends, spouse and children because of pornography? No person grows up with the ideal of being an addict, a rapist, or a pedophile. No one dreams of having a marriage that breaks down.
I believe that every decision and every action that allows us to avoid pornography is a good thing to do, as circumstances allow.
3- It is important to lean on friends. Of course, it is necessary to look for true friends who are interested in our problem. It is not easy to find friends, and even when you do, it may be very difficult to share a problem as personal as this. And they may not always be able to give you a solution, but the moral support they provide in a situation like this, where we feel demoralized, is crucial to moving forward in the firm resolve to abandon the addictive practice of pornography.
In case you don't have a friend to share this with, one place you could find support is in a church. Although they are generally the most judgmental, it is generally the place where they will take the matter most seriously. In any case, try to find a Church that is not very traditionalist. I comment on this based on my personal experience, and although it sounds very religious, I think it can be applied to non-religious people.
Anyway, this is my opinion, I hope I have contributed something with it.
Willpower, it's like competing in any sport, despite losing, don't give up, always think of "one more" I want to watch porn, I'm going to last one more day without doing it, because I'm strong, and Mr. do not let go of his hand
It is normal for my husband to look at pornography every time he is having sex with me.
Hello Yadi, everyone,
It is not normal for your husband to see pornography while they have sex, look, I have had problems for years and I fight every day to quit, pornography annoys me, it seems dirty and aberrant. I can go for long times without watching anything related to porn, but when I watch it is as if something inside me forces her to do it, my brain feels physically saturated before and after watching it, I despair, I feel uncomfortable and dirty, my self-esteem is lowered In an absurd way, something strange happens to me before and when I see it, I am almost always physically and mentally tired, saturated I have dissatisfaction, I hate to see a guy having sex with a woman or even more it bothers me to think about orgies and those things With that I have no problem because I do not see any of that but I have allowed those images to clutter my mind, I am very interested in seeing naked women, only women have always been only with women. I am currently married and I expected a little more femininity from my wife, more delicacy is her personal care and a little more sensuality, but she always has excuses for money or time to get ready or exercise, to take care of herself and always uses my way of be like a justification. I told her about my problem, the first thing she did was cry and get indignant, then she decided to help me, that help lasted a month. I am a Christian and the truth is I want to find another way to abandon this vice in a way other than with religion.
Neither willpower nor anything other than having someone to talk to in confidence have helped me, despite being a Christian I can tell you that religions try to help you but they still judge you, they make you feel a sinner all the time and a bad example, everything time you are a walking danger and achieving forgiveness is the only motive that some have.
I spend my time working, working and working or at home listening to my wife fight with my daughter, she always looks ugly and badly groomed and she is not ugly, now she is not working I hoped that by supporting her she would improve her attitude a little and have more time to take care of herself but she is a disorderly woman, so now I justify seeing naked women in the little interest I feel for my wife.
But I made my first mistake when I got to the army, it was there that I saw pornography for the first time, I learned good things in the army, but damn the day that like an idiot I sat down to watch pornography, I hate that damn day and I remember it As if it had been yesterday, I started this damn vice that I detest, I took the step that I should not take, loneliness and lack of love were my justification for continuing wrongly today I have other excuses as I wrote.
I do not extend myself more But take care of yourself as a woman, you will never have to see yourself or try to be the image of a porn actress, you are worth more than that, all good women are worth more than that, but be attractive, careful and feminine for your husband, Sensual with him and very active in sex, always be prepared to smell delicious, and be very jealous with your intimate care, that will help your husband and displace pornography. Do not leave him alone, he needs you, take out the television of your relationships and earn all that space. Greetings and success.
The consequences of this addiction are terrible and irreversible, I was the girlfriend of a porn addict for 10 years and his wife for 7 years, since I knew him I knew that he watched many porn movies, but as we were teenagers I thought it was normal for him to At that age men would see so many movies like that, as boyfriends our sexual relationships were very good because he repeated with me everything he saw in those movies, but always despite the fact that they were good, he felt it as distant, as if he were having sexual relations With another woman, he always told me things like that he would have liked me to have bigger breasts, or that he would have liked me to be oriental or black, I tried to please him in everything he asked me, until a One day he told me that I wish I could please him with a trio, I refused, and he told me not to pay much attention to him, that it was just a fantasy… .when he saw women in the street, he told me, look at that woman she looks like such a star p Orno… but inside everything he was faithful to me, and it didn't happen that everything was fantasy.
I faced him and told him everything I had investigated, at first he got very angry and said that he was not abnormal, that all men did that there was nothing strange, days later he confessed to me that he masturbated daily watching movies two or three times a day while I was gone and that with that I had enough, which is why I no longer wanted any physical contact with me ... later and I accept that I had a problem, but I did not know what to do.
Now he is struggling to leave his addiction behind, he deleted all his movies, threw away all the boxes he had saved and has tried to resume his life like any normal man, it has cost him a lot of work, there are times when he relapses, especially when he feels Nervous or anxious, he has tried to compose everything with me ... but I was so scared, because there were many years in which he was absent with me in so many aspects and he made me feel so bad, in fact he even blamed me, telling me that I was the one that no longer caught his attention ... that now that he wants to have a normal life with me, I am so affected, that I am currently in therapy and fighting to regain my self-esteem and personality lost by living with such a person ... we are about to divorce and even though I admit that he has already changed and has made many advances, I am very disappointed in the man that one day I loved so much ... this is my experience, the experience of a woman who has lived with a porn addict for many years ia and that from my own experience, I assure all those men with these characteristics, that they have a big problem that will prevent them from having a normal relationship with a woman and make her happy, they will always make her feel incomplete and unhappy because they are too busy with yourselves and your sexual fantasies, that you occupy all your mind and soul ... they will always be deficient men as long as you do not solve that problem with a therapist and with a lot of willpower ...
Appointment, I am going through a similar situation with my husband just a week ago I confronted him and the truth is I am still very hurt, he recognized his addiction and others but the pain that overwhelms me I do not know how to handle it and more because I am pregnant as you describe your husband everything everything absolutely everything is what I lived with him ... he blamed me when he was the problem now I want to resume life in a different way but it is costing me and just tomorrow we will go to a specialist psychiatrist in my country on these issues ... in Finally I am giving him the opportunity that I beg so much and I cry so that he will forgive him but it is extremely difficult for me because he is 30 years old and with the problem since he was 10 years old everything started with a magazine and now it has no limits because he watched hardcore pornography ... I discovered it because he separated himself from me, he stayed up every night and went back to bed at 3 am, I thought it was because of his work but I did not run into this harsh reality ... I have already eliminated his extensive collection ion of videos and others but always the INTERNET that leaves everything at hand without limits even he told me that he does not regret anything of the deletion because it was completely free ... heavens that makes me doubt his word because he has lied to me before ... I hope in God that therapy is a help to deal with it because I am not willing to expose our future son for his addiction.
Pornography is a disease and to overcome it you have to put a lot of will of yourself, because nobody will do it for you. And if you believe in "God" well ask him for help .. x my part I am sure that there is nothing or anyone, or any "supreme" being better than yourself, in your will and if you are willing to overcome it. but respectful of the beliefs of each one.
I know it sounds simple but doing something else is the best option and not trying to find a method.
I am very disappointed in my husband, we have only been married 3 years and have a beautiful baby. He is 17 years older than me and months ago I discovered that he frequently visits porn pages and dating websites, pretending to be single and 37 and 38 when in fact he is 52 the very Ridiculous. I don't know what else to do, because in addition to doing my household chores I am loving, funny, sexy, I support him in everything, we go out constantly and I fix myself well, I get my figure back 3 months after giving birth. He is loving with me and we have very good sex, but I don't understand why he frequents pornography? When I confronted him he told me that this is normal here in North America for both men and women and that he does not have any problem (he does not accept it). He works in the technical department of computers in a bank here in Canada and I am worried that his problem could affect him at work as well. I have already deleted two pages. different favorites, but I discovered another page. I still love him, but I feel betrayed and I no longer admire him, many times I want to have a special detail with him but I remember his problem and I say: he does not deserve it, so stop That I do.
His problem is ending the love I have for him and I don't know what else to do to make him leave that nasty vice.
pornography is bad and sinful in all circumstances
Hello everyone.
Today I understand that I am addicted to pornography and masturbation, also to sex.
I am 29 years old, I grew up in a Christian family and today I am estranged from God. I started watching pornography and masturbating at the age of 14. My performance and way of relating to me has been affected at work, family and society. I lost my girlfriend, an important job, today I try to continue my postgraduate studies but they are also interfered with by this evil. I'm at a stage where porn videos no longer excite me, it doesn't come later. I tried to seek help, the psychologists did not help me, I tried to visit a recognized sexologist in Santiago de Chile but I found it very expensive to consult US $ 150 each session.
The testimonies described above lines, I am scared by the unhappy way it ends, and one is unable to perceive the damage.
I would like to form a foundation, where you have free access to specialists, both in science and in spiritual material.
If any of you are interested, contact the email: freddy.tk@hotmail.com
Thanks for sharing this space.
Regards, Fredy
I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for six years, and three of coexistence fell, over time I realized his lack of desire for me, I finally discovered he was addicted to porn, he did not cheat on me with another as I thought but if he liked it more that I, little by little I laugh feeling worse, more despised, he never touched me anymore, if he kissed me he hugged but when night came he hugged me and no intimacy, he only said I did not feel like it, that he loved me but I did not feel like it Sex with me, for me as if the sky had fallen on me, it is hard to explain that role I feel like a little woman through what happened, I do not know how to wake up if I wish, although now she does not see that out of respect for me, either It's my turn, and when I ask him, he answers, you're only wanting the other, a whole humiliation for me and an indescribable pain… .who can help me ???
very good article, congratulations
The same thing happens to me, everything the same, I don't know how to do it, I love him and he says he loves me, but I feel like a little woman, since he wants that more than I do, he does not touch me, he hugs and kisses me but no intimacy 🙁
I understand you because I go through the same thing and if I try it, I tell him that porn puts him more even though I am his life and he loves me but he likes the other thing more, it is humiliating, degrading, he feels like a little woman and still tells you that do not feel bad that you are beautiful and loves you,: ´ (
your mother is rich and in a thong
I was entangled in pornography and masturbation for about 4 years, I couldn't quit. This is not a problem of the mind or of human strength to stop doing it. when I received Christ in my heart I knelt down and changed my life without feeling, I no longer did it and stopped watching pornography. let Christ rule your life and you will see the change. Only He can help you and take out everything that man cannot do. Christ Jesus loves you.
As much as God enters my husband, he does not leave that or touch me 🙁
I have a 17-year-old son who is addicted to pornography, I no longer know how to talk to him, he locks himself in the bathroom for hours, he does not want to go out with us or with his friends and the worst of all is that he watches large-caliber porn like his brother fucks his brother bone incest? Please help???? I don't know how to do it anymore
Karina, please write to me aguilar220@hotmail.com
I would like to help you. GOD bless you.
It could be said that the women who appear in pornographic scenes are sick, is only the money motivating enough for them to degrade in that way?
Certainly pornography is a disease, my husband began to acquire that taste and today that almost separates us, he says he loves me but because we are both chubby we do not make love and recently my daughter found him photographs of him having sex with a prostitute. I complained and he said that he took the picture so that I could grab a roll for chubby I answered him but I love you like this, chubby short and ugly and he says well, I don't like you ... He does not exist, unfortunately that is not an excuse for infedility but if porn changed everything because he seeks to have sex with women of standard porn movies ... now we are waiting if he changes if he will not be free to go live his crazy life, ha but ha he got into the crisis of the 50s hard ... ..it's a shame that a 25-year marriage almost ended because of that = (
For many, pornography is supposed to be a sin, and I start this note by saying that, because we always live life thinking about what is good and what is bad, and this is how we survive, we know that stealing is bad, and not it. we do, because it affects the other, so it has been socially agreed that stealing is bad, and laws were created to control those low human instincts of wanting to "get something" easy and at the expense of another, even though stealing something supposes a temporary gain, also supposes a high risk to the loss of the freedom, the health by some beating or the loss of the life. Those are some consequences of doing the wrong thing. Likewise, society knows that having sex by force is something that affects the other person, so it is also considered a sin and a crime, just like theft, wanting to do something is not what is definitely wrong , the really bad thing is to carry it out, but if wanting it is what leads me to do it, then that desire becomes something potentially bad too, since sooner or later it will make me go out of my box and commit the sin or the crime.
So I think that what makes something a sin is the fact that you harm another person, including yourself, because even trying to kill yourself is a crime. Also, any person who does harm to another feels a minimum of guilt and in the subconscious a very poor and low image of himself is created. Whoever does not respect his neighbor does not respect himself either. Well, he thinks that what he does is not bad, even if he does it to a being equal to him, to a similar person, who feels the same or different, but feels.
This is how a sin is something that hurts others and oneself at the same time. Watching porn has a couple of benefits, in my opinion you learn what adult sex is, and if you don't mind having sex before marriage then it can turn you on and turn your relationship into a sexual sense, but it does its consequences, and once you know what adults do, you want to experience it, and that has consequences, such as unwanted pregnancy. Because although many couples are surprised by the arrival of a child, even if they take care of themselves, some do not have it very planned yet.
Addiction also comes and that is where you prefer to imagine in your mind than to live in reality. And the years go by, you are left alone, you get old and without family, without a job, without friends, etc. Also if you have someone you neglect it, it seems ugly or it no longer excites you, because you always want something new, as in addictive substances, it is sad to be with someone who does not love you and prefers someone else; even if it's virtual. It is a fantasy of the mind, but it is not something real, although the pleasure is real, it is not the same to imagine, than to make love with a real woman. apart that physical and mental wear is greater in masturbation.
For those who want to leave pornography, the exit is GOD, there is that concept of a being that guides you towards the good and the right, that if you have faith that if it can exist, it becomes a reality for you, so certain that you It can lead to a place in your mind and your spirit that you couldn't even imagine now that you don't believe; It is true to a large extent that this is a very effective solution, because there comes a time when you focus so much on the spiritual that you fill yourself with a spirit of good and do not want to do evil or sin, even if you think about it. There is also psychological help, but I think both should be guided. Everything you want you can achieve if you really want it and you show it. But bad luck, but you still have to always have faith.
I am addicted to sex. I am a member of a 12-step community aimed at solving our addictive problem and achieving sexuality.
This addiction is very complex but there is hope for recovery
They can write to saacostarica@gmail.com
I'm from costa rica
I am Lilian from Bs As Argentina and about 10 months ago I am chatting with a man from another far away country Australia and the other time he proposed to me to see a graphic porn movie and he put it in his house that is, we saw it remotely on his Country and I in mine, but I saw that he did not move a hair, that is, he only looked and it did not produce anything, so much so that I told him if he liked it, he said yes but it did not produce anything, it was related to couples Heterosexual, most of the sequences having oral sex or it will be that he is gay or bisexual I do not know, the only thing I know is that I like him but I see that it is strange it will not be that he is addicted to sex, because when he finishes connecting with me I He says that he is going to work but I see him connected on skype that is, he connects with others, but he lies to me and also says that he writes to me from facebook msg on his computer and that he does not have a cell phone, when I saw in the chat of facebook the drawing of a phone that was connected. Maybe he is a sick person or he likes other things, that you advise me please !!!!!!!
Hello
I do not know what to do
I need help
How can I stop watching porn and masturbate
It is difficult to quit but it is almost a year that I do it discontinuously
I know I like it but then I feel like it's a bad thing and my willpower doesn't work anymore
I need help please
I even wanted to block the pages but those eagerness to see and relax from tensions make me unblock those pages again 🙁 help me
Marco let's write to saacostarica@gmail.com
I am disappointed in my partner, it is not the first time that I have surprised him, once I found him subscribed to a page of »nalgotas» and I swear and again I swear that he had not done it, it turns out that it was in his gmail, I believed him and I forgot everything happened, but it turns out that today I found him again, he forgot to erase the History and there he was on another page of sluts, he was very surprised when I complained to him, and once again I swear it was not him, if not in his office , uffff ... I no longer believe anything when I see those images for us and orgies, I am not a puritan, but he does and goes on praying, praying, giving sermons, I no longer believe him, we have talked so much about trust and he respected. He was a serious and very educated man, with strong moral values, I do not want to continue complasc with him for deception. He disappointed me as a couple by lying, I always complasm, almost everything and we talked about sex, I no longer want to be with him, he thinks he is a puritan, but he is more fucking than the same fucking, a falsifier. Orgies and porn are not for me. I am old-fashioned I believe in Love and respect. And if I do not prefer to be alone and you turn to be Happy in deception.
Goodbye.?